The 6am Pilgrimage Home

There’s something magical about seeing the sun rise after a night out. It could be the fresh morning air or the more likely fact that your blood alcohol content looks like a phone number, but there’s an undeniable charm about an early morning after an evening of debauchery. With a heavy heart and a lighter […]

You can now get your vagina high


We women go through a lot a shit, and with that ‘time of the month’ once again, lurking up behind me, I feel the urge to bitch and moan, uncontrollably rising. While it sucks for most of us, it isn’t all bad if you live in California. See, these women now have bragging rights to […]

The Ultimate Monday Morning Pep Talk


“Mondayitis: a feeling of weariness, sadness, apathy and general distress that many of us feel when starting the Monday morning working week.” For me, Mondayitis actually kicks in on Sunday arvo, whispering in my ear, telling me to go fuck myself So how to avoid the emotional perils of a Monday morning? Besides moving to the […]

Life in a caffeinated state


Last week, Jamie, from accounts asked me to go to a motivational conference with her on the weekend, at this stage I was 2 double shot coffees deep and the caffeine chimed in, telling me it’s a fantastic idea. Before I knew it, I’d accepted, agreed to the $60 VIP upgrade and promised to drive us. I […]

I’m sorry, am I boring you?


Most people don’t actually listen to you when you’re talking. Have you noticed? We’re all pretty talented pretenders… You can tell when their eyes dart all around you, looking at everything and everyone BEHIND you, but rarely focusing on your face Or, they may have positioned their phone on the table in front of them and […]

I was mind-fucked by Uber Drivers in LA


Pop quiz time. What does a pot dealer, paranoid-gun-lover and wannabe actor all have in common? They’re all mentally unhinged Uber Driver’s of course. *** Jumping into the sticky, leather seats of the silver Uber ride outside our Venice beach hotel, I felt my foot nudge against something hard under my seat and watched, curious, […]

Unsolicited Advice for my Dickhead Ex


We all have our dickhead ex-boyfriend stories (also known as DEB from hereon in). DEB, while I don’t hate you, you DO probably deserve a brick to the face. Like Vegemite and jam on toast, so were we, NEVER meant to pleasantly go together. I thank my lucky stars that I have severed ties with my […]