Losing your phone is just the worst. In an instant, all your photos, your apps, your pocket-sized identity disappears down the proverbial shitter– not to mention the mind-numbing tirade of having to create that stock standard Facebook event ‘Lost Me Phone: Send Me Ya Digits.’
So it goes without saying that, ideally, you’d want to take preventative measures against this travesty. ‘Find My iPhone’ is a nifty little method of sniffing out your cell in the backyard of that trap house you got belted at last night– but there’s only so far an app like that will get you when a sticky-fingered thief comes moseying along and flogs your iBaby. Sometimes you really do have to take matters into your own hands.
Meet Huo. Huo is a truck driver in Foshan, Guangdong Province, China. Huo is probably a nice guy. Like Jason Statham, he’s just there to pick up the package, no questions asked, and deliver it to its destination. But some people evidently want to fuck with Huo– and when you fuck with Huo, you feel Huo’s wrath.
Recently Huo was sitting in his truck waiting for a delivery, hurting absolutely no one, possibly playing Super Mario Run, when a stranger knocked on the door. Huo, assuming this was the deliveryman, did the right thing and dialled his boss– at which point the stranger reached in and snatched his phone.
“Big mistake” said Huo, cracking his neck and knuckles (unverified).
The thief jumped on a nearby scooter and jetted off. But when he chucked a U-turn and came speeding back past the truck, Huo was waiting in the middle of the road, ready to exact his vengeance. What happens next is nothing short of legendary.
Huo, the undercover Bruce Lee of the consumer goods delivery industry, launches himself into the air at the exact moment the scooter comes racing toward him, fly-kicking the burglar to the ground. He then lays in a punch for good measure, staunches the fuck out of the now-terrified thief, and retrieves his phone.
And that’s not even the best part. Watch the above video from the twenty-five second mark and you’ll see that Huo’s had a Goddamned durry hanging from his mouth the whole time. Not once during the whole ordeal does he think to take it out.
Huo told local news it was the third time he’d lost the same phone in two months, the silly duffer that he is.
Seriously though, Huo the man.
Feature Image: Flickr/Stokeparker
If you have a story that you'd like to share, please submit it here.