Police Called To Deal With ‘Uge Fuck Off Tiger, Turns Out To Be A Toy

I don’t think there could be many more disturbing calls to receive as a policeman than “Excuse me, there’s a huge fucking tiger on my property and I need you to come sort it out, cheers.”

When 24-year-old farmer Bruce Grubb wandered out of his house to check on his pregnant cows, he saw what he thought was a very real tiger. He quickly noped the fuck out of that situation and rang the police, who arrived shortly after.

“I had absolutely no doubt it was real,” Grubb told the Scottish Sun. “I got a hell of a scare. I was worried it was going to eat all my cows before police managed to shoot it.”

The incident was quickly shared around various humour groups, including a post by UK Cop Humour.

“Nervous radio updates start coming in stating it was unclear if the Tiger has eaten any cattle but it appeared well fed and it’s ears were seen to twitch but other than that it was very settled,” the post said. “After some time a rather sheepish sounding Sergeant comes on the air and declares that it was indeed a stuffed toy!”

The North East Police Division responded to the incident by posting a statement on Facebook, which was delightfully littered with puns.

After an hours standoff, police did indeed confirm that the tiger was fake and they went on their merry way.

Ah well, alls well that ends well right?

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