North Korea Reckon They’re Keeping The Nukes, But Might Open A Burger Restaurant

In a bizarrely predictable turn of events, North Korea has effectively said “get fucked” to any notion that they’ll get rid of their nukes, but as a gesture of goodwill, they’re willing to allow a western fast food franchise into the country for the first time ever.

According to NBC News, “The CIA report does not specify which fast-food brand could be invited to North Korea, but said [Kim Jong Un] envisioned that the establishment could be used to provide food during the talks and would show that he was open to Western investment.”

It’s a clear move to appease Trump, who’s well known for having the diet of a 12-year-old whose parents have left him alone with $100 for the weekend. Pizza, burgers, soft drinks and KFC were all mainstays during his 2016 campaign run.

In 2009, North Korea opened their own version of a western fast food shop, serving “mincemeat and bread” along with fried chicken and other delish oddities.

“The hamburgers weren’t quite up to snuff, but the fried chicken was delicious with a nice crispy coating,” one Japanese traveller said. “Also, since they gave me a little plastic glove to eat my chicken, my hands didn’t get all greasy. I thought it was a pleasant little surprise to the whole experience.”

Air Koryo, North Koreas national airline, serve a hamburger on flight. According to tour operator Simon Cockerell, it’s straight up trash.

“It’s not very nice and it’s not clear what kind of meat it is. Probably not dog,” he told MUNCHIES. “Nobody flies Air Koryo for the food, but I’ve probably eaten about 30 of them so far, and only when very hungry. The vegetarian option on the airline is ‘don’t eat the burger.’”

I for one can’t wait to see what fast food chain will have the honour of uniting the world in peace, hopefully Maccas.


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