I’ll just give you a second to truly unpack that headline. Okay, all good? Let’s dive the fuck in.
An incident at student accommodation has left one young fella in extremely hot water, and probably wishing he knew when to shut the hell up.
Apparently, Newcastle man James Mason was pulled up by cops and decided to be a bit of a cheeky cunt, “f**k off you’re not searching me” before saying “ha ha, told you I had f*** all on us, you mugs.”
Any normal person who had drugs on them would at this point, take a deep breath, thank the police officers and thank your lucky stars that you aren’t sharing a cell with some bloke called “Bubba”.
What did Mr Mason do? Well, he took the opportunity to continuously swear and talk shit to the police officers, like an absolute fucking drongo.
However, coppers then noticed that Mason kept adjusting his pants, and took him to the station to strip search. What they found there is either impressive or terrifying depending on your outlook.
“He removed his trousers, pulled back his foreskin and pulled a white bag of powder from his penis. The defendant was asked what it was and replied that it was cocaine.”
Mason was then fined 120 pounds for possession of a Class A and drunk and disorderly behaviour. He was also told to pay £85 costs and a £30 victim surcharge.
Definitely one of the dumbest criminal interactions we’ve ever seen, take a bow mate.
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