We all need to tell ourselves lies sometimes. Any uni student (or hapless stoner) will acknowledge just how prominent and necessary Mi goreng is in this time of our lives. We may as well look at the positives and just accept that we’re probably all going to end up with heart disease, but at least we’ll have degrees! I’ve prepared this incredibly scientifically sound list of health benefits to raise awareness of this little-known superfood.
Stress reduction
A packet of migos takes all of two minutes to prepare from package to plate. This gives you more time to study than if you had made a proper home cooked meal, reducing anxiety associated with deadlines. In addition, you get the added benefit of enjoying a great brain food to sustain your studies.
Long Term Weight Loss
Mi goreng is pretty comprised of carbs, saturated fat, salt and MSG, more commonly referred to as the essence of health. I’ve created a flow chart to explain the long term benefits of regular Mi goreng consumption.
High Mi goreng consumption →
High blood pressure →
Raised heart rate →
Burn more calories →
Beautiful new you.
Gains
There’s 8.4g of protein per pack. If you have three packs that’s about the same as a protein shake. Forget macros. Take a few packets with you to the gym and treat yourself to this protein-rich supplement after a great workout. Helpful tip: If you boil the noodles in your protein shaker, it’s easy to drain and you just shake your sauce in afterwards.
Positive Body Image
If you’re living on Mi goreng you’ve probably given up caring what you look like. You don’t care what anybody thinks because you are what you are and they’ll just have to live with it. Confidence is sexy. You are sexy. Beautiful new you.
Risk Minimisation
There’s nothing more dangerous than a drunk person trying to cook after a night out. With Mi goreng, cooking risks are eliminated, because pouring hot water into a bowl can’t possibly be considered cooking. Those sachets can be tricky though. We urge you to approach with caution.
There you have it. Believe it or not, either way you’re going to have to face the reality that Mi goreng is going to be a big part of your life while at university (or living on the streets). You may as well pretend it’s doing you some good.
Happy heart disease everybody!
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Written by Josie Harvey (@JosieHarvey_). Photo by Chris.
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