Science Catches Men Lying About Their Dick Size

In an apparent attempt to shirtfront cocksure lads the world over, a tech blogger and data/dick enthusiast by the name of Lukas has put together the beguilingly titled ‘World Penis Data’ graph: illustrating beyond dispute what everyone pretty much already knew about men’s delusions of phallic grandeur.

By plotting the answers that a study sample of men gave about their penis size against the empirical findings of researchers, Lukas neatly demonstrates that the average fella can be very cocky indeed– in some cases adding a good centimetre-and-a-half to the actual length of his member.


The green represents what researchers recorded, while the red represents what the manly men claimed they were packing. As shown, these guys overextend their estimations almost every time.

In displaying how far blokes typically overshoot the mark, the graph also acts as a helpful guide to what the average penis size actually is– around 9.2cm for a flaccid frankfurt, as it turns out, and around 13.4cm for a full-blown stiffy.

Of course, we all know that what really matters is not the length of the lumber but the girth, weight and mass of the thing. Unfortunately the so-called ‘World Penis Data’ graph fails to account for any of these factors, making it a somewhat reductive and incomplete picture of the myriad dicks of the world.

If nothing else though, the data has proven effective at exposing a few bell-ends.

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