I’ve spent a good portion of the last five years reading about alternate ways to use recreational drugs. As a relatively uneducated society, we assume the totality of a drug’s power is equal to the sum amount of which you take it. That is, take five ecstasy tablets and get five ecstasy tablets worth of wasted. But scholars – fascinating, open-minded people, often highly educated, sometimes verbose – have made significant leeway in proving there’s a whole new world outside of ‘getting fucked up’ when it comes to narcotics.
Like many others (no doubt), the catalyst for my interest in drugs came in the form of James Fadiman’s The Psychedelic Explorer’s Guide, published in 2011, roughly one year before Fadiman appeared at the fifth annual ‘Horizons: Perspectives on Psychedelics’ conference in NYC. I’m sure that book, and perhaps even his appearance, which is oft-quoted and referenced, are foundations for a whole swarm of enthusiasts.
At the conference in NYC, Fadiman – who to drug enthusiasts was looked upon as favourably as Al Pacino is to film buffs – publicly discussed the topic of microdosing.
Microdosing is “a technique for studying the behaviour of drugs in humans through the administration of doses so low (“sub-therapeutic”) they are unlikely to produce whole-body effects, but high enough to allow the cellular response to be studied”. It’s a fascinating concept, and one that I’ve had a small to moderate amount of experience with over the past 48 months. You can read the nuts and bolts here, and I strongly suggest you do, if only to add context to the following recount.
Like all things growing in the internet age, the idea of microdosing has suddenly become popular. With its newfound popularity comes an inherent interest in how it all works. In particular, people have grown fascinated with firsthand recounts of microdosing, particularly when strands of familiarity link the storyteller and those listening.
In late 2014, I had a consistent and controlled supply of LSD that allowed me to microdose for seven days, while working at my job, living the same life I lived every other week.
For clarity’s sake, I will give you a brief outline of my circumstances, omitting just enough to maintain anonymity. I am 28, I work as an account manager, a broad term for people in a number of industries who are forced to deal with clients and/or manage portfolios. I would estimate 35% of my time at work falls on the creative spectrum, while the remainder is a blend of numbers, interpersonal duties and telling people things they don’t want to hear.
I live in a major city and commute fifteen minutes to work on a bus. I was given the LSD by a long time friend whose ability to access high quality narcotics is few and far between, but when this particular friend can, it’s wonderful, medical-grade product.
As far as the dosing goes, I did seven days without any variant in dosage. In retrospect, this wasn’t the most intelligent plan – many people will use intermittent stoppages to stifle tolerance increase – but a wide scope of trials is imperative to a greater understanding. So I did my part.
Now, for the let down.
If you’re reading this for the novelty value – picturing me navigating my workplace in some sort of Hunter S Thompson-like state – you will leave unsatisfied. The very core of microdosing is removing the adverse effects of a drug. And yes, as much as you may find it hard to believe, adverse is an apt term to describe seeing walls drip like an overflowing pot of honey. Such a feeling is not one you want to have in the company of your conservative coworkers.
My days were not so much altered as they were brightened. I used a stopwatch to time my regular tasks and noticed a marked improvement in areas I consider ‘mundane’. This was particularly noticeable in tasks in excess of thirty minutes, where I shaved five to seven minutes off their total time. Things like data analysis (and pretty much anything that involved Microsoft Excel) definitely saw the greatest improvement, which I found particularly interesting. I hadn’t envisaged improvements in the numbers game.
I certainly felt more energised, and I was void of the routine highs and lows that one experiences when they’re simply running off coffee. As such, my interpersonal skills improved – I felt far more grounded and level headed and often went into meetings with the belief I had an edge. Whether or not this should be noted is debatable – as it could boil down to a placebo effect from simply believing I was under a performance enhancing drug. Regardless, it was evident.
The most noticeable effect of all was the amplification of my mood. A few times throughout the week, I found myself overly excited or interested in something, to the point where I had a couple of sideways glances from a co-worker, akin to the kind of looks you get when you act a little too rambunctious at after-work drinks and you get that awkward, momentary stare from a judgemental individual. This was enough to make me feel uncomfortable, but not enough for me to change my behaviour. I couldn’t. The LSD had its plans and I was to stick to them.
In the creative spectrum, which was certainly the area I expected to thrive most noticeably, subtle improvements went unnoticed until I looked back on the work I produced during that period. The quality of my work was certainly of a higher standard, if only slightly, especially given the time it took me. There was also an air of positivity to many of my communications, no more extreme than days when everything just seems to go your way.
To surmise the positives, I was more effective in rudimentary tasks, particularly ones involving numbers. I was also more personable and felt more grounded, but I was definitely more excitable and, in general, experienced the kind of mood amplification one can’t obtain naturally while in a boring workplace environment. I was also slightly more creative, and my perspective on life was steadfastly positive.
As far as negatives, pupil dilation was evident. On the second and fifth nights, I had a lot of trouble getting to sleep. I can’t say I noticed anything negative outside of that, though on the eight and ninth days – at the conclusion of my makeshift trial – I felt moderately depressed and had a slight increase in anxiety. As far as I’m concerned, the dosage at which I was taking LSD and the timeframe that I took it shouldn’t result in anything. Perhaps it was my state of mind.
One of the primary shortcomings of microdosing – particularly evident in the dedicated Reddit threads – is a lack of third perspective. A person may feel more effective and heightened, but a lack of present peer reviews and supporting documents mean it’s hard to tell what level of truth statements like “I was more productive” actually hold.
I had the opportunity to confide in three friends at the conclusion of my experience and see how they’d perceived me for the week. Unfortunately, as I didn’t want to tell them prior to commencing my week under the influence (and skew their perception), they hadn’t paid enough attention to me so as to provide any clear notes.
Having said that, the fact there was nothing significant or stand out proves there was no overt change in my character during the time period.
Since my first experience, I haven’t had the chance to microdose again, which is primarily because it requires a more clinical approach than you could obtain from buying street-level drugs and taking ‘roughly the same amount’. Regardless, I believe my initial experience was a positive one, and opened me up to the idea of doing such a thing again in the future.
I don’t recommend anyone trying what I have tried. I am not advocating microdosing. I am simply providing my experience on the matter, which, for me, just so happened to be a positive one.
It was nothing like what this guy went through.
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Anonymous.
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