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Unsolicited Advice for my Dickhead Ex

We all have our dickhead ex-boyfriend stories (also known as DEB from hereon in). DEB, while I don’t hate you, you DO probably deserve a brick to the face.

Like Vegemite and jam on toast, so were we, NEVER meant to pleasantly go together. I thank my lucky stars that I have severed ties with my DEB and while I cant say where he currently lies on the spectrum of Dickhead to Legend, I’d be willing to bet good money that he still lies somewhere close to dickhead territory

If I were to ever bother giving my DEB some tips, to lessen his Taylor-Swift-like trail of disenchanted exes, I would tell him this:

 

I could go on and on my friends but I’m going to show some restraint and leave it at that.

Thanks, DEB, for being so terrible at being my boyfriend!

I now know how to distinguish a turd from a legend (& so does everyone else reading this).

Categories: Short & Sharp
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