When it comes to orgasms, we are all slaves to physiology. Reaching climax for both men and women unleashes a raft of uncontrollable physical reactions that are best left unanalysed. But those awkward facial expressions and yelps of satisfaction are just the tip of the iceberg. It wasn’t until the 20th century that doctors began to realise that sexual functions, especially those of females, had effects on the body other than getting pregnant and subsequently ruining one’s ability to get loose with the girls.
Today the wonders of modern medical science can explain why your partner groans like a suffocating chimp every time they reach critical mass. So with this in mind, here are some orgasm facts that you should know, even if you don’t want to.
Your dick is your clit and your clit is your dick
The penis and the clitoris originate from the same type of tissue which for those of us who are not medical experts, literally makes them the same thing. When an embryo is about four weeks developed, this tissue can go either way and by week nine, it becomes visibly male or female. This in part explains why male orgasms and female clitoral orgasms apparently feel quite similar but interestingly enough, the amount of testosterone present in the mother’s body at this stage also helps determine penis size. So there’s another thing you can blame mother for.
Heroin and male orgasms are pretty similar
In 2003 the Journal of Neuroscience published a sexy report called Brain Activation during Human Male Ejaculation. The report detailed physical parallels between the high experienced from heroin use and sense of joy a bloke gets after rubbing one out. Of particular note is the effect on the cerebellum, which controls your muscular movements and other cognitive functions like your attention span and emotional processing. The same level of cerebellar activation seen in a heroin rush corresponds with that of ejaculation, pleasurable music and even monetary reward. Although published just 12 years ago, this report was one of the first indications that sex can be highly addictive.
Different types of female orgasms can be blended together
Some people like their martinis shaken, others prefer them stirred while some just blend ice, vodka and goon together and call it whatever they want. Same rule applies to orgasms. No doubt there’s different ways of getting off, but the most intense female orgasm reportedly involves a big blend of clitoral and vaginal stimulation. Admittedly for men, this one can be surprising but for most women it’s a no brainer. The clitoris is highly sensitive making it way quicker to bring the woman to climax. The vaginal orgasm though, is a bit tougher because it involves finding that elusive G-spot. But when both are combined usually by starting with the clitoris, bringing her to the edge of climax before moving on to the G-spot, the result is an orgasm that will make your neighbours call the cops.
Women aren’t the only ones that have multiple orgasms
Orgasm and ejaculation are not the same thing. Whereas ejaculation is usually the result, an orgasm itself is a result of muscular spasms in the pelvis, which then sends an electrical storm to your brain via the nervous system. The brain then translates these impulses into a perceived sense of pleasure. Ejaculation on the other hand, involves semen flowing from the urethra as a result of these pelvis contractions, before being discharged at the point of orgasm. Although uncommon, this is why some men can ejaculate without getting hard and others can last for hours, experiencing multiple orgasms in the process. Taoist monks in ancient China first documented this in 2968 BC and even developed a method of extending the period between orgasm and ejaculation that many still swear by today.
Clitoral piercings mean better orgasms
The Orgasm Answer Guide, printed by the John Hopkins University Press, has become something of a bible for publications like Esquire, Women’s Health and Cosmopolitan. When looking at research into piercings, the book concludes that women who pierce their clitoral sheath and/or their anterior labia minora (folds of skin around the clit) are likely to experience more intense orgasms and increased sensitivity. Although the reasons behind this tend to differ from woman to woman, a common explanation is that the increased sensitivity makes the friction experienced during sex more pleasurable. For men on the other hand, getting you member pierced is unlikely to improve your orgasm and will just mean you’re out of action for at least a month. Why would you do that to yourself?
The world was created by cum
While Aristotle was the first to document female squirters, the Egyptian god Atum was the first to create a universe by jerking off. The ancient Egyptians believed that Atum the Creator ‘made union with his shadow’ and built the world from an ocean of divine frothing semen. This one isn’t so much a medical discovery than it is a historical oddity but it does make you wonder how much of human history has been shaped by that instinctual need for sexual gratification. Let’s just be thankful that other religions didn’t adopt this belief, although it would bring a new meaning for Catholics who ‘take the body of Christ’ during communion.
When reached in the intimate and passionate moments of sex, orgasms have a romantic appeal that echoes from our most basic human instincts. When looked under the scope of medical science, orgasms are yukky and gross and usually smell bad. Either way, the chances are you’ll have sex again but next time you approach orgasm just take solace in the fact that this is as close to heroin as you can get without putting a needle in your arm.
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Words by Dominic Cansdale.
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